Bless Us Oh Lord for These Thy Gifts...

Wednesday 8/10/10

I’ve been home now for two days, and it’s still hard for me to fathom my two months in Nicaragua. I’m still exhausted, emotional, and confused by many parts of my experience. Navigating through my thoughts and emotions and the life I lived while in Nicaragua compared with my life here has turned out to be a much more trying journey than the 15+ hours of travel it took me to get home. Many aspects of myself have grown and changed, but at the same time I’m fundamentally the same and can see myself with greater clarity.

Before arriving in Nicaragua the word I focused on was risk, that traveling to a third world country that I had little experience in outside of textbooks was a risk that I was willing to take and necessary to my development as a human being and a disciple of Christ. During my time in Nicaragua, I was faced with many negative situations that tested my faith and showed me a side of Nicaraguan life that’s tough and not so pretty (I decided to emit most of these experiences from my blog). I often found myself frustrated with the religious experience I was having in the midst of terrible human suffering and a loss of innocence in a city full of crime, sex, and poverty. However, at the same time I was witnessing incredible beauty- the beauty of the landscape, the people, and above all the beauty of the human spirit and the relationship with the divine. Before my time in Batahola I prayed all the time, but my prayers consisted of “Lord, Please help me to…” “Lord, I want…” “Lord, I need…” Plain and simple, coming to Batahola taught me how to pray and more specifically how to give thanks. Being surrounded by people who constantly praise God and instead of asking Him for things thank Him for all of the blessings that they have received and simply ask Him to bless others was something extraordinary. I found myself thanking God for every moment, transforming my life into a life with God as opposed to a life that God watched unravel from a safe distance. All parts of my life were given greater meaning and significance, and nothing was taken for granted. I am able to appreciate the infinite number of blessings in my life, and feel grateful for them as opposed to asking for more and more and more. This may seem overly basic, but a large part of my “transformation” was owed to spending time with my host family around the kitchen table. (I was not supposed to eat three meals a day with my family, but I did just to spend more time around them.) Every meal began with grace, and by grace I mean prayers deep from the heart about all of God’s blessings and constant presence in our lives. Many times it was our prayers that sparked the most interesting conversations during dinner. My “despedida” or final goodbye dinner with my host family was a little too much for me to handle on Saturday night, but when it came time to say grace I opted to go. All of my previous graces had been in English, and it had been a semi-joke within my family. However, this time I was prepared to pray in Spanish and even brought a copy of my grace to give to my family. Here is the English translation and I think it sums up my experience in a way:

Prayer Before Dinner for my Nicaraguan Family

Thank you Lord for all of the blessings that you have given us in our lives

Thank you for each experience, each moment- the lessons that we learn

Thank you for this nourishment and food, for our health, and for the love we have for each other and this land

Thank you for the time we have together to share our blessings, our talents, and our stories

Please utilize our talents in order to transform the world in which we live into Your Kingdom

And use our talents in Your name to defeat injustices and to show our love for You

Amen

Me and the Family- Gerardo, Sarita, and Maria Eugenia

The Final Countdown

Friday 8/6/07
This week has been even busier than usual, and I am undergoing the most bittersweet feelings as it is evident my summer in Nicaragua is coming to an end. Both my third and final sessions with the Scholarship Students occurred this week, my last day in Nueva Vida was Wednesday, and today was my final conversation class (I will miss Marcos, Gladys, Erick, Belkys, Maria, Dolores, Alfred, Deyvi, and Albert so much it’s not even funny).

Conversation Class

As discussed earlier, Sunday was the third session with the Scholarship Students. The session was entitled Woven Narratives: From Individual to Community and it can be best described as a beautiful disaster. The goals for the students were to: finish the mural tour, publicly present their personal narratives using “Rivers of Life” as their guides, and make connections between their personal narratives and their collective/community narrative. Prior to the session I had been told two contrasting stances about having a session on Día de Santo Domingo. 1) It would be perfectly fine because all of the Scholarship Students would still be willing to come because not many Nicaraguans care too much about Día de Santo Domingo 2) It would be ill-informed and a cultural faux pas to hold a session on this day because it is such an important religious holiday to the majority of Catholic Nicaraguans. Upon asking the group of twelve, all but one student said they would be willing to attend. Therefore, despite the premonitory feeling I had deep down I decided to stick to the Sunday schedule and have the session on a holiday. Apparently, it serves me right because at 1:30 (we were starting early to finish the mural tour) there were 0 scholarship students. At 1:45 there were two, and by 2:00 there were five. The big 5, Melvin, and myself decided that at 2:00 it was time to get the show on the road. Unfortunately, the guard at the center put the brakes on when we were not allowed entrance because of a mishap with scheduling. At 2:10 we returned to the classroom, and at this point I was feeling a bit crestfallen because I had spent 2 days creating CCBN Mural Trivia but I decided to continue onward. I scrapped the agenda and split the group into two groups of 3 (yes there were 6 students in the end!). The students had 10 minutes to review their “Rivers of Life”- the visual guide of the moments in life that students think define their existence- and then I made the decision that each student would have to make a presentation that would last 5 minutes minimum and they would be videotaped. It was a tough task, but I thought they would be able to handle it. However, never in my wildest dreams would they have handled it so well. The first student to present, much to his horror, was Maycol. Maycol normally becomes shy, quiet, and speaks very rapidly when he is in front of groups. His presentation ended up being 10 minutes long! It was well thought out and started with his childhood and ended with his future goals, and it was deeply personal and moving. I’m not going to share his personal story now (or any of the other students because it’s not my place), but his struggles, how he is working through them, and the role of the center in helping him improve his life situation was truly inspirational. Then afterwards the personal narratives of José Ángel, Ariel, Ana, Sharon, and Emma were just as powerful and real. There were tears and hugs, and I was so proud and impressed by each one of them. The session ended with a presentation by Melvin about the mission and history of the center and the lives of the founders Fr. Ángel Torrellas O.P. and Sr. Margie Navarro, CSJ. I was also equally blown away by Melvin’s presentation. All in all, though half the class missed out I felt something very special occurred in that room on Sunday. I was talking about the session with José Angel afterwards, and he said he felt like a huge weight had lifted from his shoulders and now he is full of confidence and has a greater level of trust and understanding with the rest of the scholarship students that participated that had not existed previously. That was just what I needed to hear.

We decided collectively that since I was leaving in a week, that a final more formal presentation in front of certain members of the Administrative Team on Thursday at 2:00 that really emphasized the values of the students and the importance of the center in their lives would be fine. My next two days were devoted to planning the event: making certificates and friendship bracelets, sending out invitations to the Administrative Team and the instructors in the center (Special Thanks to Amanda), and holding a two-hour make up session with the students who did not attend on Sunday.

Wednesday was a nice day to take my mind off the presentations, as Gerardo and I finished the mural on the clinic in Nueva Vida. It was a great day full of painting, and pictures, and saying goodbye to new friends. Actually, making new friends too… We had lunch at Jubilee House (the compound for Bucknell Students and other volunteers) and Gerardo and I had the chance to play with a monkey named Bella! It was so much fun! The day ended with a celebratory dinner back at the house and chocolate bon bons! I was so grateful to have had the opportunity to experience Gerardo’s work every Wednesday, and to meet people in a different community while spreading the mission of the Center.

Final Day at the Mural

Bella

Then came Thursday. I still have mixed feelings about what happened on “the big day”. The morning was spent finalizing the certificates with stamps and signatures (they were legit). By the time 1:45 rolled around I did not know how to feel, but I knew that what happened during the final presentations was out of my hands. At 2:00 our list of attendees was two scholarship students, Amanda, Melvin, and no audience- and that’s when I became worried. At 2:30 we had an audience of fifteen including all members of the administrative team, and five scholarship students who were no longer comfortable presenting their personal narratives- and that’s when I became distressed. The students were upset because they were not aware in advance that some of the members of the audience were going to be there, and I take full responsibility for that. Thankfully, after some pep talk from Melvin and my introduction about what occurred during the past three weeks and the goals of the project, four of them got their game faces on and presented shortened and edited versions of their narratives. They were competing with the sounds of a ridiculously loud air conditioner and a torrential downpour outside, but what they shared was enough to initiate a fruitful question and answer session with the audience after the awards were presented. I was pleased, because what the students did was by no means easy and the audience was able to recognize the need for a program about sharing personal narratives and honing leadership skills within the community. I’m all about sustainability, and it turns out that even though I am no longer going to be physically present in the Batahola Community, Melvin has fallen in love with this project and he and Amanda have decided to take it on with a little more help from me and with the full support of Jennifer (the coordinator of the Center) behind them. They are hoping to work with different groups within the center such as the dancers and the chorus, and I can’t wait to see what happens. It’s just going to be ridiculously difficult to leave…

Jennifer and Melvin with His Award

¡Feliz Día de Santo Domingo!

Sunday 8/1/10

During my conversation class on Friday morning, before the learners began creating imaginary creatures like Pepe the Worm and ElephantCat and playing Apples to Apples, we had a discussion about plans for the weekend to incorporate the future tense into our learning. This was the first time I really heard information about Día de Santo Domingo (I had previously heard there was a holiday today, but I had not known what it was or the significance to Catholics in Managua.) The story behind the holiday, according to my fellow conversationalists and Catholics Marcos and Gladys as well as vianica.com, goes as follows: Sometime a little over 100 years ago in a rural part of Managua called Las Sierritas a farmer by the name of Vincente Aburto was cutting down trees when he found a small statuette of an unknown saint inside of a tree trunk. In an effort to identify the saint, Vincente (and his curious neighbors) brought the statuette to a local church where the priest told them that it was the image of Saint Dominic de Guzmán. The men decided it had to be some sort of sign, and left the statuette inside the church for the night. However, upon returning to Las Sierritas the group found the statuette in the exact same location it was in the first place! Astounded, they returned to the priest to tell him what they had seen, and the priest said it was impossible that the statue had returned because he had locked it away. The men ran to the church to find that the statuette really was no longer there! The mysterious movement of the statuette of Saint Dominic made the priest believe that the image wanted to remain in Las Sierritas. He told Vincente and his neighbors to build a home for the image at the site it was discovered, and have Saint Dominic visit Managua every year accompanied by dances and happiness. Since the fourth of August is the day of Saint Dominic according to the Catholic calendar the period from the first until the tenth of August was chosen as a time of celebration. Over the years, the tradition of having a procession to move Saint Dominic from Las Sierritas into the center of Managua grew in popularity and “Minguito” began to be interpreted as a bringer of miracles and the new patron saint of the city.

Each July 31st, the same statuette is taken off its altar and placed on a pedestal where it is protected by a glass capsule and surrounded with colorful artificial flowers and feathers. At 6 AM the next morning there is a mass followed by the start of the procession and special events for Saint Dominic. Thousands of people participate in these events, and either accompany “Minguito” on the walk to the Santo Domingo church in the center of the City or simply watch from the side of the road. The most notable and important participants in the events are called “promisers”. The “promisers” are individuals who made promises to Saint Dominic to take part in the procession after prayers to the saint were answered and miracles occurred. The promisers wear colorful traditional attire and perform a special dance of Saint Dominic. In addition, the pedestal is carried on the shoulders of many of the promisers, who do not carry the pedastal in a straight line because they move and sway with the music.

Watching all of these events unfold on the Canal 10 Noticias- the odd costumes and dancing, the drinking, the excess, the bullfighting, and the injuries- I’m not quite sure how to feel about this holiday dedicated to Saint Dominic who I consider to be very important as the founder of the Order of the Preachers and whose teaching is the basis for my educational experience at Providence College. My host family is Evangelical, and therefore like many Nicaraguans Día de Santo Domingo is simply a day off where Catholics (many of whom are intoxicated) perform odd rituals. Maria Eugenia told me last week “Oh yeah, Sunday is a holiday but we try to stay in the house because the streets will get too crazy and dangerous.” I was not told that the streets would be filled with “crazy” Catholics. I’m wondering if there is a fine line between religious fervor and all out tomfoolery. I think Día de Santo Domingo is a fascinating mix of culture and a desire to dance and worship. However, I don’t know if it is borderline idol-worship because I’ve never seen anything like this in my life. Old men, women, teenagers, young children all swaying back and forth, singing, and following this giant bright orange arc of the covenant looking vessel with a tiny statue under glass.

My concerns were slightly appeased by the homily at mass tonight. The Friar used the Second Reading from Colossians 3:1-5 to explain the way a Catholic should act during Día de Santo Domingo and every day. The reading states:

“Put to death, then, the parts of you that are earthly:
immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire,
and the greed that is idolatry. 
Stop lying to one another,
since you have taken off the old self with its practices
and have put on the new self,
which is being renewed, for knowledge,
in the image of its creator. 
Here there is not Greek and Jew,
circumcision and uncircumcision,
barbarian, Scythian, slave, free;
but Christ is all and in all.”


He asked us to reflect on our actions during the day. Were they Christ-like in the way that we showed our devotion to “Minguito”? Did we give in to some of our passions and desires? He advised us to avoid the temptation to take part in the excesses and focus on the devotional part of the holiday. The gist of the homily was WWJD because we are all reflections of Him. My major fault of the day was that Jesus most likely would not have scheduled His third session with the scholarship students on a Sunday and one of the most important religious holidays of the year. More on this later…

Chocolate Charities- To Give or Not to Give

Saturday 7/31/10
Today I had the opportunity to travel to the City of Masaya with Sarita and Maria Eugenia for a little sight seeing and shopping. I was super excited since I don’t get out much. We woke up at 6:30 to take a microbus from la Universidad Centroamericana. The 17km trip was about 45 minutes long, and I was just happy to have a seat. Masaya is known as the “City of Flowers” and is the center of Nicaragua’s artesanía production. Upon entering the city it was noticeably different from Managua, with cobbled streets, fresh air, potted plants, and beautiful architecture. It is home to two exotic craft markets, which were our focus for the day. The Mercado Nacional de Artesanía or Mercado Viejo (Old Market) is located behind grandiose castle-like walls and is full of what felt like hundreds of stalls and vendors selling items from your “basic” hammock to turtles that have sadly undergone taxidermy. We spent the day perusing the shops and bartering with vendors, but we had little intention of purchasing anything.

On the walk back to the bus station, in one of her supreme acts of generosity Maria Eugenia bought me two large chocolate frosted donuts with sprinkles. Now, the majority of my experience has been receiving far more than I need and I am supremely grateful and humbled by the overwhelming kindness. However, there is only so much donut that I can handle. So we gave my second donut to an elderly man dressed in ragged clothing and lying on the street. He did not ask us for anything when we walked by, but Maria Eugenia nonchalantly went up to him and asked, “Excuse me sir, would you like this donut?” He smiled the biggest toothless grin I have ever seen and told us that he could not remember the last time he tasted chocolate, and sent us health and blessings from God. Our experience with the man on the street was only a minute, but it got me thinking about charity. I’ve always struggled with when to give and not to give, but the prevalence of poverty here makes the “struggle” daily. Nicaraguan culture is a culture of dependency; it’s sad but that is the way that the majority of the population have learned to live their lives. Walking the streets you have children running up to you with little grass creations that they have weaved, tugging on your clothing and telling you they need money. Sitting on the bus you have people stand up and start speeches about how so in so is in the hospital and the bill cannot be paid, and a frequent visitor to Ruta 114 is a blind man who plays songs on an accordion and asks for your extra change. People who have lost limbs sit in wheelchairs in the middle of the streets at stoplights and approach your car and knock on the windows. This question “to give or not to give” often turns into a lose-lose situation for me. I either give money and feel guilty because I think that they money is not going towards something positive, or I don’t give money and feel guilty for not doing anything. I have been warned by numerous people not to give to the children especially, because it aids the development of bad habits early in life and they most likely give the money they make to lazy parents that don’t want to work. Seeing the man with the donut, I’m thinking maybe I should just carry around tons of food with me in my final week here and anyone who asks for money I should just give him or her a power bar instead. At least when I give food I know that it can only be used as food- well maybe it could be bartered for other items??? I was hoping I would somehow come to a solution to this problem in a conclusion to this post, but apparently I’m going to have to ponder this one.

Friendship Bracelets Fixing the Wrong Kind of Friendly

Friday 7/30/10

My final friendship bracelet making class just ended and it’s starting to become real to me that I’m going to have to leave the Center soon. Over the past three weeks I’ve been having two-hour friendship bracelet making classes on Friday afternoons in the Crafts Corner of the library thanks to the librarian Arlen and the support of a scholarship student Ariel. I brought 2 giant bags of friendship bracelet string down here with me, and “Knots for Nicaragua Part 2” was actually supposed to be an afternoon dedicated to friendship bracelet instruction and construction for the youth in the center. Alas, that one time event happened to occur on an extremely hot Wednesday 5 weeks ago hours prior to a hospitalization caused by dehydration and a stomach virus. I thought the event was a loss, because I was having difficulty instructing the kids in Spanish and I had to rush out on them after only teaching them one bracelet pattern. However, weeks after I found myself being constantly bombarded with the inquiries of kids (especially a pair of sisters Stefany 9 and Juelkis 11) in the community about when the next class was going to be. I decided to take action and met with Arlen to schedule the class as a weekly activity. The class size and make-up varied every week, but there were always between 20 and 30 enthusiastic kids ready to learn about friendship bracelets. For those kids who attended every class, they made it from your basic Chinese Staircase all the way to the Cherokee and I was so proud of their work ethic. I even found out that Gerardo had students that were arriving an hour late to his painting class because of friendship bracelets- oops!

The classes were certainly tiring though, with just Ariel and I running around to the constant yell of “¡Muchacha!” and “¡Muchacho!” Which to me translates as “Hey lady/guy!” and I still don’t know how I feel about the fact that I respond to that title. Reflecting on levels of respect and politeness, I think today’s class was particularly stressful and frustrating. The class consisted of twelve boys between the ages of 10 and 12 and four young girls. The boys were consistently making snide remarks and side comments about me, even to the extent of addressing me directly as “Gringa”, telling me they “love me” in English, and asking me if I will move to Nicaragua for them. It was not all twelve of the boys, however, the fact that even within the walls of the Center a few young boys feel that is acceptable to act in this manner makes me ill. Even though my summer in Nicaragua is almost over, I still cannot get over the way that men treat women here. There is a bright spot though. Each time a boy would call me “gringa” or “chela” (“white girl” or “light-skinned girl”) Ariel- who is 17 and very shy- would chastise, “Her name is Hollis so call her Hollis.” Having Ariel help me out with the class has made me realize how important the scholarship students are as role models in the center. Ariel has an important role in the lives of the kids in the library- far more important than me- even though he may not fully recognize it. (That is why I think the personal narrative project is so important and I can’t wait to see the final results this week!) Rudeness and all, I think taking the time to do the friendship bracelet classes were worth it even though some of my other projects, like the Google Map project, have been put on the backburner because of time constraints. It’s great to be able to share a skill as simple as making bracelets with string, and see that kids are enjoying themselves and getting something positive out of the class.

Take the A Train- Nica to Manhattan

7/30/10
This week was more full of the arts for me than usual. On Monday, after turning in my informe to Jennifer and Gretchen I was invited to go with Amanda and 15 students to the Teatro Justo Rufino Garay. The Teatro Garay is one of the only two existing theatres in Managua (Julia you need to get down here and make some theatre magic!) We saw a play entitled “La Revuelta” (The Revolt) that, as an outsider in both culture and language, was a little difficult to follow but powerful nonetheless. Here is what the English translation of the program says:

“The theater Justo Rufino Garay is staging “The Revolt”, the text of the Argentine playwright Santiago Serrano, which exposes the drama of a timeless rural family, under the domination of a powerful domineering mother who loved her more than feared her.
Since this woman's physical disability is all powerful and becomes the burden of her children, her disability is idealized and mystified and she is able to dump her sadism on those around her. In the end, she is even able to commit murder in the name of "freedom."
Through this story of passion, vengeance, lack of principles and abandonment of ideals, "the struggle for power is stark, it gives opportunities for dialogue, nor to agree on certain points to be able to build something," says the author.
Lucero Millan, director of Justo Rufino Garay, in recent years has been sadly proving that Nicaragua is again a deeply polarized country, where the prevailing ideas silence the ideas of others. In this sense Millán mentions the definition of "fanaticism" and a heightened passion, unrestrained and persistent, particularly to a religious cause, political or otherwise, and a surpassing of rationality to the point of killing to defend their own beliefs.

Committed to society

‘We as a theater group are committed to the context in which we live and have the sole desire to help this society become increasingly open, democratic and tolerant to all, without distinction of social class, religion, political position, ideology , the ethnic, or the cultural; we need to contribute to a culture of tolerance and acceptance without any fear of the game and exchange of ideas, there needs to be a diversity of opinion and respect and consideration of differences, "he says.
Millán notes that the staging of The Revolt is a humble contribution of a group of artists to debate a central issue in Nicaragua today.
"We love Nicaragua, we love its people, are part of it, we need not spend so much energy into disunity, we think it is time to consider a joint project of nation that will benefit us all equally, which together contribute to creating a culture of tolerance,’ he stresses. “

I think that the most impressive part of this show was what occurred after. (Although the acting was incredibly powerful.) The director Lucero came to talk to the group along with the actors and discussed the issues and topics presented in the play. The students ,albeit young (I shouldn’t have thought their opinions would not have been as strong because of their age but for some reason I did), presented their opinions in very mature and thoughtful ways. Topics came up about the machismo culture and a stifling of the opinions of women in particular, and there was a lot of discussion about the respect of diverse opinions. I couldn’t help but think of my fellow Smith Fellow (ha) Julia the entire time, and how theatre really has unlimited potential to fuel social change. Unfortunately, the actors were quite upset with the group because there were only 15 people in attendance in a theatre that seats 100. The theatre was specifically opened on Monday afternoon for everyone in the neighborhood of Batahola (not just in the center). One of the actors mentioned that it was a disgrace to himself and the other actors to perform to so many empty seats, and in all honesty he was absolutely right. (This is a problem I’ve noticed a lot involving the Center. There are often incredible activities going on, but there is such a lack of publicizing and advertising that many people miss out on things.) It truly would have been an amazing experience to see 100 members of the Batahola Community express their opinions about the show; however, at the same time I feel that those 15 students and myself and Amanda really did get a lot out of the production.

In addition to theatre, concerts filled a significant amount of my schedule this week. On Sunday and Monday, because of a lack of time I only was able to catch the first half an hour of concerts put on by a visiting orchestra from Spain that was founded by Fr. Angel (one of the founders of CCBN) many years ago. However, I did have the opportunity to go to the Teatro Nacional Rubén Darío for the second time on Tuesday night (the first time I went was last week with my friend Erick to witness the final exams of his peers from UPoli who are Opera majors). The Teatro Nacional is the primary of the two theatres in Managua, and Nicaraguans are especially thankful and proud of the Teatro Nacional. The Teatro Nacional managed to survive the ’72 earthquake and the fall of the Somoza dictatorship. After the FSLN took over in 1979, instead of destroying the Teatro Nacional , which was designed by Mrs. Somoza after the Kennedy Center, the government decided to open the teatro to the general public and create a space to embrace the arts. Sitting in the Crystal Room of the theatre under giant chandeliers was certainly a surreal experience. The orchestra was magnificent, and so was the Chorus from the center (also founded by Fr. Angel). The fact that I can witness such beauty because of my connection to the center continues to astound me. The concert on Tuesday was followed by a Jazz concert on Wednesday night put on in the center by a few members of the orchestra. Even though I thought the Orchestra’s concert was impressive, the Jazz concert was truly something to behold. Just imagine: 7 Spanish musicians- trumpet, cello, percussion, flute, clarinet, OBOE, and a singer- playing the smoothest jazz you’ve ever heard. The woman who was singing had this great soulful voice- and they did songs like Duke Ellington’s “Take the A-Train” in English. Again, I was taken to places outside of Nicaragua, while at the same time being completely astounded by this crazy country and my crazy experience.

Feliz Cumpleaños a Ti...

7/27/10
One would think that spending your 20th birthday in a foreign country without your family and close friends would be a lamentable situation. However, my birthday here was unforgettable because of all of the incredible people in my life here. I spent all of Saturday afternoon with David, and he gave me a tour of the National Plaza and the Port of Salvador Allende. The tour was more of a refresher from my time here in March, but it was far more interesting to hear about the history behind the buildings from someone Nicaraguan who holds incredible pride for his country and his people. (Added bonus: he told me a great story about how he took his first steps in front of the monument to Carlos Fonseca in the plaza. I later was shown a picture so it’s legit!) Little to my knowledge, my time downtown was part of a clever ploy to keep me out of Batahola. My family had told me that the 24th was a day to celebrate grandparents in Nicaragua (Why wouldn’t I believe that?) and that we were going to take a taxi to another neighborhood and go to a party to dance with the elderly friends of Gerardo. I don’t know why, but I had 100% belief in the fact that this “Fiesta de Abuelos” was the plan for my Saturday night. (I’m pretty sure it was the excited text message-“Are you pumped to dance with old men???” in Spanish of course- from my host sister that sealed the deal. ) I didn’t want to change my outfit for this party, but I was coaxed by Maria Eugenia (though I didn’t feel the need to bathe after a day in the dusty streets of Managua- yeah great). Gerardo, Sarita, and I left to go get a taxi (which is in the same direction as Amanda and Greta’s house so there was no reason for me to suspect anything). Gerardo said he had to ask Amanda a question and after being led into the house and into the Salón de Belleza I still did not suspect a thing (no joke).
Then: ¡Feliz Cumpleaños!
Yes, there was a surprise party for me and Ciro (one of the muchachos from the neighborhood who turned 23)! The room was full of my new friends in Batahola: and there was cake, and food, and dancing, and music- all of the basic ingredients for a good party. Amanda, Greta, and the muchachos had planned the whole thing. I got to wear a sparkly tiara that said Happy Birthday on it and everything. It was a great night! (followed by an early morning)

Gerardo, Sarita, Me, and Greta at the Surprise Party

The actual day of my birthday (July 25th) was the “Día de Deportivas” (Day of Sports). Amanda planned this day in order to utilize my history with volleyball in some way after the plan to start a sports league for girls did not take form. The games started a little after 9 and I was the referee of the volleyball tournament (Of course I wore my tiara again because it’s not like I don’t get enough attention already for being a tall gringa.) There were only three teams, but the athletes were passionate and very comical at points. (Fights over calls are easily won when you have a whistle. haha) After volleyball there was a soccer tournament, and because of a lack of teams and combined with the heat we decided it was best to cancel basketball. Danza- the group of folkloric dancers- ended up winning both tournaments with certificates and medals as prizes. The “Day of Sports”, even with the few problems that occurred with teams, was very successful.

The Intensity of Competition

Miss Referee

Me and Amanda

After the tournament, I got to have a special birthday lunch with Gerardo full of vegetables and pitalla juice (my favorite!). He was supposed to go with MariaEugenia and Sarita to a birthday party for my cousin Javier (previously planned to be another dual birthday party, but I had my duties as a referee to attend to. I felt awful because apparently a “Go Diego, Go” piñata was bought for me.) but that morning when he found out that I was just going to eat tortillas by myself in the kitchen he said he couldn’t stand the thought of me being alone for lunch on my birthday. I honestly cannot express how much Gerardo and his family mean to me. They constantly tell me how much of a pleasure it is to spend time with me, but the feeling is more than mutual. I thank God every day that I have chances to spend time with them.

An excellent lunch was followed with my second session with the scholarship students. The second session was entitled “The Basic Elements of Public Speech”. The goals were:

- To continue the process of making the scholarship students comfortable when speaking in public
- To introduce the students to the basic elements of public speech
- To continue to reflect upon personal narratives
- To review the history of the CCBN

I gave the students 5 minutes to review the personal narratives of their imaginary creatures, and then they made 2 minutes presentations about their creatures while I recorded video. After the presentations, Greta presented her personal narrative in a manner opposite to which a person should present themselves in public. I asked the students to tell me what they thought was odd about Greta’s presentation and we discussed the 10 basics of public speaking: 1) Body Language 2) Articulation 3) Pronunciation 4) Tone of Voice 5) Rhythm of Words 6) Pauses 7) Volume 8) Quality 9) Changing Elements of Voice 10) Emotion. Then, we reviewed the videos of the students on my laptop and analyzed the presentations of each student with a +/Δ list. (This is something I learned in PSP 101. When analyzing something you don’t do a list of positives and negatives you do a list of positives and things that might need to be changed, because negatives don’t accomplish anything positive.) The students analyzed and critiqued each other openly and told me that seeing themselves was incredibly helpful. We didn’t follow the agenda exactly, and I hadn’t planned to take video of the students and show them but at the last second I realized how much Sarita videotaping me while I practiced my presentation about personal narratives had helped me. The session ended with half of the mural tour in the center. Melvin and Rigo did great jobs, and served as examples as how to present yourself in front of an audience. The students were even asking questions about the murals! Overall, it was an excellent second session.

I got to have a really nice birthday phone call with my real family (because there is no internet in my house) before I left for mass at 6, and when I returned my family had a birthday dinner for me including a delicious homemade chocolate cake. This was the first birthday I’ve had where I never actually received a material object as a gift, but I think for the first time in my life (yes I’ve had selfish and materialistic tendencies during my life) I felt that I received far more than I could have asked for or deserved. My entire experience here has been incredible, and that is because of all of the people who have come into my life here. Scratch that, that is because of the people who have let me come into their lives. It’s going to be so hard to leave in two weeks.

Sharing is Caring

“ If you don’t know how to share with others, you’re not truly a human being.”

Of course, I’m quoting the wise words of Gerardo from dinner on Friday night. We had been talking about a woman in my conversation class who said that one of her favorite activities is to share things with others. (In particular, as a teacher, sharing knowledge with children.) Before I came to Nicaragua the concept of sharing was not something foreign to me, but I don’t believe I had ever thought about the act of sharing as something essential to my life. However, it has become quite clear to me that sharing plays a major role in my life every day. Whether it comes down to the sharing of skills, food, clothing, houses, stories – here in Nicaragua most everyone seems to understand and embrace the concept of sharing with gusto. Even the children here enjoy sharing much more than I ever did as a kid- I’m constantly receiving pieces of cookies and candies, drawings, and hugs. I’ve come to realize that in most circumstances sharing is much more than just giving physical objects. Sharing is a way to express to others what you care about and what you love. When you share a piece of a cookie (granted in some circumstances you might be full and not want food but that’s not the point here) you are showing a person you care for them. Similarly, when you share a personal story with someone it is a means to show someone what you care about.

That sharing of personal stories, ladies and gentlemen, is what has been my focus for the past week and a half. A project thats initial goal was to be a documentary about the CCBN has turned into a Personal Narrative and Public Speaking workshop because of needs that were presented to me by different faculty in the Center. The workshops are built upon what I learned in my 202: Community Organizing class. (Chiefly, the teachings of Marshall Ganz). Here is a portion of the executive summary that I turned in for the project proposal so you can have a better idea of what the workshops are about:

Objective

To utilize the power of personal narratives of youth who participate in programs at the CCBN as a means of fundraising and personally empowering individuals through a strengthening in self-knowledge and identity. Storytelling is an incredibly powerful tool for connecting human beings and inspiring them to action. Whether that action be communicating the purpose and activities of the center to the rest of the world or building community in an expression of shared identity and values.

“We have the opportunity to share our personal narrative: This is what I’m doing. This is who I am. This is why I’m important. This is what I care about.” - Edward Norton

Goals
• To empower youth of the community and strengthen their sense of identity.
• To have youth of the community realize the role of the CCBN in their lives and value its importance.
• To strengthen the storytelling abilities of the youth and teach them how to properly articulate their story as a means of motivating and inspiring others.
• To make the reality of the center tangible to donors and other involved outside of the physical presence of the community.

Solution
• To hold weekly 2 hour training sessions with members of the mural tour team and scholarship students for the next 4 weeks to strengthen their public speaking and self presentation abilities

Necessary Resources
• Time, energy, and commitment of scholarship students and mural tour guides.

Last Sunday was the first session, and to my knowledge it ran very well. At first, the scholarship students were a little frustrated with the idea of 2 hour training sessions every Sunday, but once we started doing dinamicas (icebreakers) and I gave my presentation about personal narratives they seemed to be more open to the ideas of the project. Honestly, the session was a little nerve wracking for me because of my Spanish ability, but I made it through all right with the help of Amanda and Rigo. I am also still utilizing PC’s flipcam and taking videos of the scholarship students during different activities so they can see their progression from the first session to the last session. I’m really excited!
My days in the Center now basically consist of making lesson plans for my conversation classes, the sessions, working on a Google Earth mapping project for the Center, and meeting with 4 different students for one-on-one conversation classes. On Wednesdays I get to go with Gerardo to work on the mural on the Clinic in Nueva Vida- it’s almost finished! Also, this Friday I’m holding another Knots for Nicaragua class in the library with kids. Yes, I’ve been quite busy but I’ve loved every minute of it! I just continue to thank God for this opportunity all the blessings that He’s given me (shared with me haha). I can’t believe I only have a little over 2 weeks left here!
Lots of Love,
Hollis

¡ "Ríos de Vida" !

Sharon and Ariel Working Hard

Vivir o Sobrevivir

7/9/10
In lieu of taking a trip with Amanda to Matagalpa for a few days I decided it was more important to bond with my new family. So, this morning I woke up earlier than usual to go with Gerardo to Nueva Vida. After taking the 113 bus for 45 minutes we finally arrived and unfortunately the poverty was great and near the worse I’ve seen. However, I feel as if I was desensitized by seeing La Chureca because the level of poverty was no longer startling. Walking up to the clinic created by the Bucknell students there was a vastly different atmosphere simply because of the brightly painted walls. We left a world full of sadness to see a glimmer of color and a glimmer of hope. The clinic is nearly free (30 cordobas so roughly $1.50 per visit) and has transformed the community of Nueva Vida. Gerardo spends almost every day at the clinic painting a mural from 9-4, and allows any child who want to participate to do so. Today I got to be his assistant, and I was pleasantly surprised by my level of painting ability. The mural depicts different nature scenes of Nicaragua as well as the daily life of Nicaraguans. I have to say one of the most powerful things that happened to me today was when Gerardo left me alone for a few minutes, and I was approached by the janitress of the clinic, Petronila Gonzales. We got to exchanging life stories (because that is simply what is done in Nicaragua- or I just over share everything) and she told me many unsettling things. For instance, Petronila told me of her 14 year-old son’s intelligence and how he excels in school, but how his gifts are going to waste because he should be studying at a level that is more difficult for him and his school does not offer English classes. To truly improve your life in Nicaragua knowing English is a must, and Petronila does not have the money to afford English tutoring and there is no organization in her part of Ciudad Sandino that offers any type of English programs. She told me, “How could I have the money? When I must use the $100 I make a month to provide water, food, and electricity for my 7 children and 4 grandchildren [one of whom is very sick].” It was in that moment that I realized the majority of people in Nicaragua, not simply those who are selling things in the street, are not working to live but simply working to survive. Petronila repeated her name and her position at the clinic several times, and I was felt as if she wanted some sort of monetary compensation or for me to look her up when I got back to the US. It’s so frustrating for me to not know how to properly deal with situations like this. If I could give her son English classes I would, but I’m only here for another month and I’m already quite booked at the Center. I also didn’t know if I should give her the 10 cords I had on me, but then I realized Gerardo and I needed to get home somehow. I probably won’t ever know how to act properly in these situations, but I told Petronila it was wonderful to meet her and I would be sure to pray for her and her family.

A Combination of Art and Service Changing People

7/8/10
5:16 PM
This morning, Gerardo and I discussed art in front of the gorgeous painting he's been working on for the past few days. He has a few art books that we used to talk about different painters, and he told me that one of his favorite artists is Degas because of the movement he creates with the dancers. It was wonderful. Shortly after our discussion, my Conversational Spanish class came through for me, because I was able to give Gerardo a presentation about the Chicano muralist Judy Baca. I wanted to show him my presentation because I found many similarities between his works and her works, especially the clear emphasis on knowing your history and the where you come from in order to not lose your sense of identity.

Speaking, I followed my presentation showing my family another Conversational Spanish creation- Mi Vida - a 7 minute iMovie about my life. During this discussion about art and then viewing a synopsis of my life, I realized how much I’ve taken my family, especially my amazing my parents, for granted. My parents have sacrificed so much for me and my sisters and created so many opportunities for us that many children never get to have. Much of the art that I know is due to the trips to museums we used to take when I was younger. I owe them the world. So yes, thank you parents. :)

11:23 PM
Just hung out with the family for a few hours. I love being with people so full of laughter and love. Some great jokes about Milli Vanilli were exchanged. (Don’t ask.) However, my family is not only full of humorous people they also have a deep understanding of what is necessary for community development. They shared a video with me from Bucknell University about their Brigade program, which is apparently a service trip to Nicaragua during winter and summer break. It’s a lot more than just a trip though, the students and professors are building a relationship with the Ciudad Sandino community. I’d really like to study this more and look into something similar for PC. Gerardo said that these projects, like the mural project, change people. Both foreigners and community members alike. Children who would never be seen performing any “acts of service” or “work” for the community are learning about what community truly means and what it means to be an active part of the community. As Gerardo said, “Service changes people.”

And wow, I happened to just find these 2 quotes in my notebook from the Fall Pastoral Council training and I think they are very appropriate for my current situation:
“I hope to have the opportunity to touch the lives of others, and really work to be a true disciple of Christ.”
“Service helps me to deepen my faith, as it often challenges me to stretch my boundaries and think about life in new ways.”

Self Expression

7/6/10
My being here is so much bigger than myself. I keep thinking all about me- my discomforts, my problems, my homesickness etc. However, tonight, I was reminded that I am here for a reason and this experience is far more than a test to see how I can handle myself in a foreign country. I had the pleasure- and by pleasure I mean I was blessedly allowed- to attend a presentation of the artistic works of my new host father Gerardo at Jubilee House in Ciudad Sandino for a group visiting from Bucknell University. (Just a quick sidenote: I moved out of Doña Rita’s house on Sunday after much discussion with Amanda about having a different Nicaraguan cultural experience than the one occurring in Doña Rita’s more than comfortable house.) Gerardo is the painting instructor at the Center and he has been painting there since he was a young boy. He felt a personal, human connection with the murals he was taught to paint during his childhood and his experiences inspired within him a passion for art. His mural skills remind me of Diego Rivera and his separate paintings are some of the most beautiful I’ve ever seen (and that was from a projector so I can’t imagine how amazing they are in real life). His style is best described as a modern Picasso. I mean, that’s the closest comparison I can make to another artist because when it comes to it his style is simply Gerardo Arias. The vibrant colors, energy, movement, and emotion expressed in his paintings and his level of technical skill are truly breathtaking. I’m not an art critic, but I know enough about art to know when it’s good and when I like it and when a person like Gerardo is creating something extraordinary. However, it is not only is his art that is extraordinary. In my opinion, what is more extraordinary is the greater story behind his art about his life and his connection to Batahola. Gerardo is a great testament to the importance of the CCBN for honing talent within the community. During his presentation I was blown away by both Gerardo and by his art. He said he feels that life is just a passing moment and all of his gifts and talents don’t really belong to him because they were given to him from other human beings through the blessings of God. Therefore, he believes it is his duty to pass on his gifts to others. That is why he works on so many mural projects with youth, like the project at the clinic in Nueva Vida (a poverty stricken community on the outskirts of Managua in Ciudad Sandino that consists of refugees from Hurricane Mitch in 1998), and why he works as the Painting Instructor in the Center. Gerardo wants all children to have the same opportunities that were given to him and for them to have a passion for art ignited in their hearts. Incredible.

In addition, his presentation focused on the importance of murals and their role in the self expression of artists. In particular, the expression of political feelings towards the government. Unfortunately, these feelings are being repressed and most of the murals that were shown in Gerardo’s presentation no longer exist because they were destroyed by the government. (I learned that former President Alemán even tried to destroy the beautiful murals in the CCBN.) Now, I realize with greater clarity the importance of murals for storytelling and documentation purposes. Man has been painting as a means of documentation and expression since the time of the caveman and cave paintings. Murals should be allowed to be painted everywhere! Now, I must do my part to make sure that the murals that still exist in Batahola are preserved and protected. Since I learned a lot about the importance of storytelling the past semester in PSP 202 (through Marshall Ganz and others), I’ve been asked to initiate a storytelling project. Part of my storytelling project is supposed to be training the mural tour team and some other youth at the CCBN about how to make tangible connections between their stories, the murals, the Batahola community, and Nicaragua as a whole. However, (and I may be biased now) I believe that one of the strongest stories at the center is Gerardo’s. He grew up during the revolution and his family was very poor. His mother sold cooked beans in the streets, and he used the charcoal left over from her fires in the morning to draw all over the walls in his house. So far, that’s all I really know about Gerardo’s childhood (not much I’m aware) but I am excited to learn more.

I think that moving from Doña Rita’s family to the wonderful family of Gerardo, Maria Eugenia, and their 13-year-old daughter Sara, though it was difficult, was one of the best things that could have happened during my time here. I truly feel at home and like I am a part of this family. We eat all of our meals together and they are constantly asking questions about my life. Maria Eugenia even gave me a lesson on how to wash my clothes by hand today because I no longer have a washing machine. Their house may be modest but their hearts are big. I’ve also never met a family who is so talented with handicrafts. Maria Eugenia makes beautiful jewelry, Sara embroiders many different things, Gerardo has his painting, and with my friendship bracelets I fit right in. This next month is going to be a good one I can feel it.

Right to Healthcare

Well, this was sure to happen sooner or later. Yes- I spent Wednesday night (6/29) in the hospital with a stomach virus and extreme dehydration. Unfortunately, the onset of my symptoms began in the afternoon during the first Knots for Nicaragua class with children in the library. However, instead of my illness being a completely horrible and debilitating experience it really showed me how great a support system I have here in Batahola. Amanda and Greta were incredible and were constantly by my side. (Amanda even stayed the night in the hospital- she slept on the floor in the hallway!) Juan and Mariluz, a couple I barely know, took me to the hospital and continued to check on how I was doing. Doña Rita and my Nicaraguan family nursed me back to health after I was back home. The Administrative team from the Center sent me a beautiful bouquet of flowers and I received an overwhelming amount of well wishes from my students and friends I have at the center. So even though my family is not here with me, though I miss them more every day, I felt more than taken care of.

Even though I was still recuperating, I managed to make it to the first ever Cierre Cultural yesterday, a celebration of 27 years of the CCBN and its mission to promote human rights, dignity, and equality to transform society into the Kingdom of God through a showcase of all of the amazing talent the Center has produced from its classes over the last semester. In my opinion, the Cierre was the best way for me to comprehensively experience all of the diverse offerings of the CCBN in my short time here. There were handicrafts, photography exhibits, paintings, beautiful folkloric dances, Latin rhythms, musical acts, singing, and theatre. The pride of each person who took part in the event was evident through the smiles stretched across every face; a pride equally reflected in the faces of the audience full of families and friends of the performers. I have to say the most striking performance for me was a skit by the children’s theatre group entitled “¿Quiénes somos? ¿Dónde estamos?” (Who are we? Where are we?) The children portrayed the hard life of children in the streets, selling whatever they can to get by and sniffing glue to make their hunger pains go away. The topic may seem extremely adult for a child to perform on stage, however here in Nicaragua it simply is the reality. The skit ended with a child carrying a large black trash bag out onto the stage and passing balloons out to the 15 other children who formed a line at the front of the stage. Each child then said a different human right that they were entitled to and popped their balloon- it was extremely powerful and reminded me of story hour last week. The fact that these children can recognize the rights they hold and the human rights to which all should be entitled is really something incredible to witness. And on this July 4th, even though there will be no fireworks here in Managua, I again find myself thankful for the rights and freedoms that I’ve been granted by being a citizen of the United States.

Next week the center is on vacation and I’m not quite sure what I have in store for me; possibly a trip to Matagalpa with Amanda to visit her friend Sara who is doing a project about water use and conservation in Nicaragua. Trip or no trip, I have a lot of project planning underway and a lot of water drinking to do. My experience in the hospital- Salud Integral, a very nice private hospital that was very similar to hospitals in the US- has also made me curious about the conditions of Nicaraguan public hospitals and the average's Nicaraguan's ability to receive good health care. We'll see if that leads anywhere...

Lots of love,
Hollis

Jesus is My Homeboy

This week has been an extremely busy one for me.
After the rainstorm raged all day last Sunday I had the opportunity to attend mass at the CCBN in the chapel for the first time. It was absolutely wonderful. The power was out for a little over an hour (a frequent occurrence) and everyone sat quietly in candlelight waiting for it to return. It was a great time for reflection- for once the air was cool, it was quiet and dark, and the little light that was emitted from the candles illuminated the gorgeous mural of Nicaraguans offering gifts to the infant Jesus. The mass began with a song entitled Entrada- You Are The God of the Poor:

Vos sos el Dios de los pobres.
el Dios humano y sencillo,
el Dios que suda en la calle,
el Dios de rostro cutrido.
Por eso es que te hablo yo
así como habla mi pueblo
porque sos el Dios obrero
el Cristo trabajador.

You are the God of the poor.
The human and simple God,
The God who sweats in the street,
The God with the weather-beaten face.
That’s why I can talk to you
The way I talk with my people,
Because you are God the worker
And Christ is a worker, too.

Hearing these beautiful words being sung I thought about my first week and all that I had seen- not places though, just people-- Nicaraguans, and the way in which they live their lives. It’s rather interesting. I live in a city where everyone seems to sweat in the street, whether adult or child Nicaraguans have a way of making nothing into something. Here, every person is a businessman. For instance, my host mother sells chocobananos and helados (chocolate covered frozen bananas and freezepops- amazing!) from our freezer to bring in a few extra cordobas. People sell water, flannel, jewelry, toilet supplies, anything you can think of: all on the street. (I wake up every morning at 6 to a woman outside my window yelling ¡Pan! ¡Pan! Aka Bread! Bread!) All of this selling is most likely directly connected to the dependence on others that has become integrated into daily life in Nicaragua due to countries such as our own, but I’ve honestly never seen people work so hard to make a living.

Additionally, all of this hard work combined with ideas of Liberation Theology have made Jesus like some sort of Pop Culture phenomenon. For instance, every day of the week I step onto multicolored buses with pom-pom like material hanging from the windows. The inside of the buses have sayings painted all over them such as, “God is Everything”, “Jesus is my Co-Pilot” and “Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life.” I also often see people wearing hats and clothes reminiscent of that “Jesus is my Homeboy” phase we went through in the US. However, as the saying goes- actions speak louder than words- and I’ve been trying to figure out if all this hype about Jesus in a country that is 60% Catholic is legitimate. I’m having trouble making connections between people saying Jesus is “cool” versus trying to truly live their lives following Christ. Possibly, I shouldn’t be allowed to make these judgments and/or generalizations about people living in such great poverty who connect their suffering with that of our savior, especially when I’m far from perfect. Still, my mind is having trouble grasping being part a culture that seems outwardly more sexual than my own (though statistically that may not be so) with vastly different relationship norms also publicly stating how much they love Jesus.

Nonetheless, I do constantly witness great generosity and love from the Nicaraguan people. For example, on the street I often see people who have next to nothing themselves give away the little they have to others in worse situations and give thanks to God for their blessings. That is definitely something I’ve learned to do here in Nicaragua- thank God for almost every moment of my life and all of the incredible blessings that I have been given. Such as: living in a country that is free, having a wonderful family, friends, food, this fellowship. Truly, every experience I have now I try to remember to thank the Lord for allowing me the opportunity to live the life that I’m living. A life in which I have the ability perform acts of community service and the chance to give and to receive invaluable gifts from other human beings. According to the priest during his great homily last Sunday (I was proud of myself for understanding the majority of it), community service is one of the most important things a person can devote their life to because it is such a clear expression of love for other human beings.

Still, even with my love for service, I was thankful to have some time this week to go on a few trips and learn more about Nicaragua. Wednesday, instead of my normal schedule of English class in the morning and Spanish class in the afternoon Greta gave me the day off and let me take Spanish class in the morning so that I would be able to take a trip with some other students from Viva Spanish School. Myself and 3 other students, along with a guide went to La Laguna del Apoyo and the small tropical picturesque towns of Catarina and Sierra del Oriente. As our microbus departed from Huembes Market and we began our drive into the country away from the stuffy air of Managua I immediately knew this trip was going to be great. The sun was shining, the birds were chirping, and there wasn’t one ominous rain cloud in sight. The bus dropped us off in Sierra del Oriente- a town full of artisans and specialty shops. There were shops with many handicrafts- anything from dolls, to dresses, to pottery. The last which we got to see made first hand. After our short pottery lesson we decided it was best during the heat of the day to take a small taxi the rest of the way to the lagoon. Coming upon the lagoon was so surprising after driving through the narrow streets and colorful buildings of Catarina – it was like falling off the edge of the world. The view was breathtaking and like nothing I’ve ever seen before. A huge hole in the earth full of bright blue water surrounded by hills with the city of Granada, Lake Managua, and the looming volcano Mombacho in the background. We were under time restraints so we could only stay for 45 minutes, but I was ready to get out a hammock and stay forever.

After the trip, there was much work to be done to prepare for a group of students from St. Ursula’s Academy in Cincinnati, Ohio that was coming to visit the center for a few days during their trip to Nicaragua. The girls arrived on Thursday night and Greta and Amanda did excellent jobs facilitating activities for them (I helped create a few dinamicos/ ice breakers but really my job was to help wherever and whenever I was needed). I had a lot of fun participating in the activities as well. For instance, Friday night the group of traditional dancers from the center taught myself and the students how to dance the folkloric “Sapo” (frog) with long practice skirts. Then we were able to take a turn and teach the dancers the “Cha Cha Slide”- odd I know but so much fun! Saturday morning we participated in the Children’s Story Time Program for 2 hours- which hopefully I will be able to work with more in the future playing games and doing great activities based upon stories. For example, one of the Batahola students read a passage about the importance of human rights and afterwards we were separated into groups and each group was told to create a different right to express through painting. My group’s right was the “right to Education” and we drew books, and pencils, a school, a globe and other symbols associated with education. It really got the kids talking about why education was important to them, and I thought it was a really great project. Other rights included, food, a home, love, and health care. In the afternoon, the girls were given a tour of the programs the center does like drawing and painting, instrumental practice, sewing class, and cooking class. I’d have to say my favorite program to visit was the one in the beauty salon where all the girls got their hairs styled in different Nicaraguan fashions. I’m not going to lie, it was pretty humorous and I did not partake in said hair adventures.

Sunday was also wonderful- except for the waking up at 5:45 in the morning part. I was allowed to tag along with the girls on their trip to Volcán Mombacho, Nicaragua’s largest volcano at 4409 feet. We spent the morning hiking the trails, and even though it was very foggy the air was nice and the jungle environment and plant life of the volcano was different than anything I’ve ever seen. I got to see howler monkeys in their natural habitat! Later, we took boats around the islands of Lake Nicaragua and stopped at one for lunch. We finished the day with a drive through the city of Granada. Overall, it was awesome but tiring. It was great to hear the girls reflecting on their trip so far and it reminded me of the importance of reflection and how I needed to come home and journal. There are a lot more activities occurring at the center this week (as there are all the time), and I hope to keep you informed in as timely a manner as I can. :)

¿Cómo se dice...?

As I watch a soccer game in the park across the street from my house continue to occur during what is basically a monsoon, it’s hard to believe that I’ve been here for a week (and how the ridiculous amounts of rain do not seem to affect Nicaraguans- Greta and I actually got caught in a huge rainstorm coming back from Spanish School and it was really fun but we were soaked. Still, I’m thankful for this crazy rain that comes every afternoon because it makes the heat slightly less brutal). This week has been so overwhelming, and so exciting, and so new, and so full of bug bites and too much gallopinto- yet so wonderful. Helping Greta every morning at the center continues to be such a blessing, and I even have a 2 hour Conversation Class that I will be running on Fridays on my own. This Friday the first Conversation Class I led was great! I used a few of the games and all of the skills I learned from being a facilitator with English for Action (an ESL program that I worked with in the Olneyville community in Providence during my freshman year). We played Pictionary, Who Am I? (that game where you have the name of a famous person on your forehead and have to ask questions to figure out who you are), and “Speed Dating” with 5 minutes for certain topics of discussion. The class went really well, but it was semi-difficult to cater to everyone’s level of Spanish speaking ability. For example, there was a student who is fluent in English and a student who had never spoken English before. During speed dating she actually tried to avoid me because she was too nervous to truly speak in English but I told her how my Spanish is terrible and how we would help each other. I think it worked out pretty nicely. I loved the Conversation Class because it gave me the chance to get to know members of the community in a deeper way than English class.

Speaking of building community, I’ve been trying my best with my limited Spanish vocabulary to meet people and build relationships. (By the way Nicaraguan Spanish is very different from anything I’ve ever heard and my name here is Holli because people drop -s off the end of words) Friendship bracelets have been a huge hit and I’ve been going to soccer and basketball games (there are a few different leagues) in the park. Yesterday, I had the opportunity to play pick up basketball with David and his friends for an hour and a half during the middle of the day (which was not the best idea for someone who is fair skinned and not used to the heat). It was really fun to play, but I have an unfair height advantage over the average Nicaraguan. Last night was also great, because I got invited to go to a birthday party of one of the music directors at the Center, Myuelvin. A group of us went out dancing and I learned the steps to the Salsa and how to “dance” to Reggaeton. (But there are still so many dances to learn!!!) I’m actually going to be taking Salsa lessons on Thursday nights in Greta’s house, and next month I’m hoping I can be enrolled in the next dance class at the Center. It’s hard for me to keep track of everything that I’m learning- new people, new places, new bus routes, new dances, new music, new movies, and above all new language.

I’m definitely still undergoing a large amount of culture shock too. It’s hard for me to understand why the culture works the way it does in many instances. For example, people with numerous medical problems and children with little straw flowers and crosses constantly approaching you and asking you for money. Or me forgetting where I am because I can watch Friends (in English) or the NBA Finals Game 7 live from a living room couch(I’m still upset with the Celtics), and then walk into the neighborhood and see people living in one room homes. Not to mention, the relationships between men and women in this culture. This week I’ve heard multiple stories about men abusing their wives and wives leaving husbands and people cheating on people and men having multiple families and it’s just hard for me to wrap my head around. Especially situations occurring within my own family. Not to mention, having too much attention from the male members of the community is something I don’t think I will get used to for my entire stay here. I just thank God that I feel very safe within my house, and with my family, and with the Center. I’m not going to lie Managua is not one of the safest places in the world, but having such a great support system definitely makes it easier.

Now that I’ve spent half the day writing this post I’d like to end with a little something I just found in The Brothers Karamazov that Kiernan was nice enough to let me have as a bookmark.

Some Simple Steps to Building Community
- Know your neighbors
- Look up when you are walking
- Greet people
- Play together
- Pray together
- Share what you have
- Fix it even if you didn’t break it
- Honor each other
- Pick up litter
- Help carry something heavy
- Start a tradition
- Ask a question
- Ask for help when you need it
- Sing together
- Share your skills
- Listen before you react to anger
- Mediate a conflict
- Seek to UNDERSTAND

Hospidalidad y Corazónes Abiertas

"¡Bienvenido a Nicaragua! Ahora, esta casa es tuyo y yo soy tu nueva Mama y no te preocupas con nada. Roughly translates to, "Welcome to Nicaragua! This is your new home now and I am your new mother and you don't have to worry about anything." Those were the first words my host mother Doña Rita said to me upon entering her house on Sunday night, and after a day of new experiences and traveling those were just the words I needed to hear. My host family consists of my mother (Doña Rita), my brother (David, 23), my sisters (Gretchen, 30 and Ninosca, 28), and my niece (Jamie, 3). The hospitality and love the Martinez family shows me continues to take me by surprise even on my fourth day here. Doña Rita makes incredible Nicaraguan food, and every dish is made with a lot of love and a lot of gallopinto (translates to- painted rooster. Gallopinto is the national dish of Nicaragua). My sister Ninosca helps me with my homework from ¡Viva! Spanish School (which I attend every day from 1-3pm on the other side of the city). Gretchen is always smiling and is always willing to help when I don't understand something or if I need her to help me teach games to Jamie. And David shares my love of sports and we've spent time both discussing and watching the World Cup and the NBA Finals. David also walks me to the CCBN every morning at 8:30 where I help Greta (who has been a volunteer here at the center for the past 2 years and will be staying for another) teach a 2 hour ESL class.

The CCBN is just as beautiful and full of life and love as when I left during my visit in March. Greta has been absolutely wonderful in orienting me to life in Nicaragua and work at the center. She's introduced me to all the staff and taught me how to take the bus, how to take a taxi, how to act as a white woman in a Machismo culture, how to shop in the market- and my learning has just begun. Today was my second day of helping out with the adult ESL class, and the students are all happy and willing to learn. (I feel like I have a special bond with them because I'm learning how to speak Spanish just as they're learning how to speak English. ) Being in this ESL class reminds of English for Action, the ESL program I worked with during my freshman year, and I'm very grateful that I had the opportunity to work with EFA because now I'm going to be helping Greta (and another volunteer Amanda who is currently back in the states) create lesson plans.

It is evident how important the CCBN is to the members of the Batahola Norte community. It is an oasis in the midst of great poverty ( I notice new things on the bus every day- such as the large gap between the rich and the poor in Nicaragua. For instance, a Mercedes Benz dealership right next to a village of tin shacks. Oh, by the way, my house is very nice for Nicaraguan standards- we have a indoor plumbing, an indoor shower, a kitchen, a living room with a tv and a computer, and I have my own room on the porch to myself.). The CCBN truly gives individuals the opportunity to escape for a while from the hard life and dusty streets of Managua. I can see stark differences between those who have been given the opportunity to come here, and people who have not been so lucky. I've watched dance lessons, cake baking, band practice, and mural painting; all the talents of this amazing community- talents which are cultivated and cared for by the hardworking staff like the well tended gardens here. Talents which people thank God for and offer up to Him. The CCBN is a sight to behold. It just makes me wish there could be more CCBNs in Nicaragua. Actually it makes me wish there were CCBNs in communities around the world. Everyone here knows each other, everyone here sees that their lives have potential and purpose.

Welcome to Miami... Bienvenido a Miami!

Sitting in the Miami International Airport it seems surreal that I'm one flight away from Nicaragua. Leaving my family at Logan this morning was very hard for me. I've never done anything completely by myself, and I was so nervous in the airport that my parents, Nealyn, and Kiernan were trying to do everything for me. However, I eventually got my bearings, took up my luggage, said multiple goodbyes to my family, and once past security I was on my way.

On the plane I had the pleasure of sitting next to a PC Alum (It's such a small world!), and a woman named Sarah who is a high school Spanish teacher from East Providence traveling with her class on a trip to Lima, Peru. We had a very fruitful discussion about Nicaragua, because both women happen to have traveled there before. (Evidently, I make friends fast and no longer felt lonely.)

After a smooth transition to talking about all of the terrible issues in the world, Sarah gave me some great advice. She told me, "Don't get depressed and overwhelmed while you are trying to make a difference in the world because it's impossible to change the whole world. Focus on one individual at a time, one piece of the puzzle at a time. Don't worry- you'll be great!" Sarah's positive attitude brought me hope and got me very excited about my experience. Her wisdom reminded me of the words of Mother Teresa that helped catapult me into a life revolving around service in the first place. (Funny, another Sarah I know just emailed me about this. By the way, thanks for all of the support everyone!) So here are some Mother Teresa quotes that I was introduced to in PSP 101 that really inspire me- because who wouldn't Google Mother Teresa quotes while waiting for a flight?

"We ourselves feel that what we are doing is just a drop in the ocean, I think the ocean would be less because of that missing drop."

"If you can't feed a hundred people, then feed just one."

"The fruit of prayer is a deepening of faith
And the fruit of faith is love.
And the fruit of love is service..."

" Love has to be put into action and that action is service."

"...it is not how much we do but how much love we put into the doing- a lifelong sharing of love with others."

"Every time you smile at someone, it is an action of love, a gift to that person, a beautiful thing."


"At the end of life we will not be judged by
how many diplomas we have received
how much money we have made
how many great things we have done.

We will be judged by
'I was hungry and you gave me to eat
I was naked and you clothed me
I was homeless and you took me in...'"

"Life is an opportunity, benefit from it. Life is beauty, admire it. Life is bliss, taste it. Life is a dream, realize it. Life is a challenge, meet it. Life is a duty, complete it. Life is a game, play it. Life is a promise, fulfill it. Life is sorrow, overcome it. Life is a song, sing it. Life is a struggle, accept it. Life is a tragedy, confront it. Life is an adventure, dare it..."

Nica here I come!

This Little Light of Mine...

Sitting in the living room with my sisters it seems impossible that in five days I will be back in Nicaragua. I was blessed enough to have the opportunity to travel to the country once before with my classmates from the Community Engagement in Latin America course, and now I feel extremely blessed to have the opportunity to travel to Nicaragua again through a Smith Fellowship that I was awarded through the Center for Catholic and Dominican Studies at PC with four of my peers. For two months I will be working in the capital city of Managua at the Centro Cultural de Batahola Norte (CCBN) and living with a family in the neighborhood. Am I prepared? I’m not quite sure. If we’re talking material/packed luggage wise I am by no means close to being prepared. I’ve been spending these first weeks of summer with my friends and family as much as possible; I was able to go white water rafting in Maine, have a nice and relaxing Memorial Day Weekend, and be here for my younger sister Kiernan’s prom and graduation.

All of this family time has been great! However, yesterday, dwelling upon my delay in packing I was starting to feel a little anxious about not being quite mentally prepared to go back to Nicaragua either. The week I spent there in March was so different than anything I’d ever experienced. I was learning new things at a rapid and overwhelming pace, but I had the constant presence and support of my wonderful classmates and opportunities to reflect upon experiences with them. I had a sudden realization that this time I will be going down to Nicaragua alone. I began to stress about traveling, meeting a lot of new people every day, living with a family that does not speak English, eating foods that my body is not used to eating, and getting homesick. I even began to doubt my abilities and qualifications for receiving a Smith Fellowship. I was wondering how I could do anything meaningful at the CCBN by myself. I am only one person, one nineteen-year-old girl who has not spent too much time outside of sheltered walls and in the real world.

Through some sort of divine inspiration, all of this ridiculous over analysis about my summer caused me to reach for the Bible and search for the story of Jesus washing the feet of the disciples that was a primary focus during Pastoral Council training. I wanted to re-read John 13 and remind myself of the importance of being a humble servant of Christ. However, as someone who admittedly does not look at the Bible very often I was unaware that the reading was in John and as I was searching for the passage I came upon Matthew 5:14-16. I was both comforted and reassured by these words: “You are the light of the world. A city built on a hill cannot be hid. No one after lighting a lamp puts it under the bushel basket, but on the lamp stand, and it gives light to all the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father in heaven.” I realized I’m not in this trip alone. I’m not in life alone. God is with me and has granted me this incredible opportunity to contribute the best of myself to others. While I’m in Managua (and for the rest of my life), I should use the skills that I know I possess and share them with others. I don’t even know what the Cultural Center needs and I won’t fully know that until I am down there, but I should not be concerned about skills I lack or expect others to want me to have skills that I don’t posses. (Still, if that circumstance happens to arise I can always learn.)

I am now confident that if I let my light shine and offer my best to God and those I will be working with I will have nothing to worry about. Needless to say, through this reading my fears were appeased, I found a title for my blog, and I decided the Bible should be a main component of my summer reading.

My flight leaves from Logan on Sunday morning! Hopefully, I will be able to write for this blog in a semi-frequent manner with updates about my life in Nicaragua. Your prayers and support during my time abroad would be greatly appreciated. :)